What actually happens in family mediation? A step-by-step guide

If you have never been through family mediation before, not knowing what to expect can be one of the biggest barriers to starting. People put it off because it feels uncertain, and uncertain feels unsafe, especially when the stakes are as high as your children or your finances.

This article is a straightforward walkthrough of what the process actually looks like at Resolve Well, from your first contact through to the end of your session. No jargon, no vague reassurances. Just a clear picture of what you are walking into.

Step one: Making contact and initial enquiry

The process begins when one party makes contact with Resolve Well, either through the website, by phone, or by email. At this stage, you do not need to have everything figured out. You do not need to know exactly what you want. You just need to be willing to explore whether mediation might be the right next step.

I will have a brief conversation with you to understand the broad nature of your situation, whether you are looking at parenting arrangements, property, or both, and to answer any questions you have about the process.

Step two: Party A intake

Once you decide to proceed, I conduct an individual intake session with you before anyone else is contacted. This is not a formality. It is where I get to understand your situation, your concerns, and what matters most to you.

It is also where I conduct a structured screening for family violence, power imbalances, and any safety concerns that would affect whether mediation is appropriate and how it should be conducted if it proceeds. This is a professional assessment, and I take it seriously.

Step three: Invitation to the other party

After your intake is complete, I make contact with the other party and invite them to participate in the process. They receive information about what mediation involves, what the process looks like, and what is expected of them.

If they agree to participate, I conduct a separate individual intake session with them. This follows the same structure as yours: understanding their situation, screening for safety concerns, and explaining what the joint session involves.

If the other party declines to participate or does not respond, I document what has occurred and issue the appropriate Section 60I certificate. Their refusal does not prevent you from accessing the court. If appropriate, I can issue the relevant Section 60I certificate, which enables you to commence parenting proceedings if required.

(A Section 60I certificate is a document issued by an accredited Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner that may be required before applying to the court for parenting orders, unless an exception applies.)

Step four: Confirming suitability

After both intake sessions are complete, I make a professional determination about whether family dispute resolution is appropriate in your circumstances. If it is, we proceed to schedule the joint session. If it is not, I will issue the appropriate Section 60I certificate and clearly explain your next steps.

Not every situation is suitable for mediation, and I will not place anyone in a process that is not safe or appropriate for them. That determination is mine to make as the accredited practitioner, and I make it carefully.

Step five: The joint mediation session

The joint session are generally conducted via Zoom using a waiting room and breakout room setup. You will not be left in a shared online space with the other party before the session begins or during any breaks.

Sessions at Resolve Well run for up to four hours. Within that time, I facilitate a structured conversation focused on what your children need, what each of you needs to parent effectively, and what a workable arrangement looks like for your family.

How the session is structured depends on your circumstances. Some sessions involve both parties in the same virtual room throughout. Others use a shuttle approach, where I move between you separately, carrying proposals and identifying common ground. The format that is most likely to produce a genuine agreement is the one I will recommend.

Whatever the format, the conversation does not start with positions, what each person wants. It starts with interests: what your children actually need, what each parent needs to be able to show up well, and what a realistic, workable arrangement looks like. That shift in starting point changes the conversation significantly.

Step six: Agreement or outcome documentation

If you reach agreement, I will draft a written record of what has been agreed. If both parties sign and date that document, it can become a parenting plan under the Family Law Act 1975 (Cth). A parenting plan is not legally enforceable in the way that court orders are, but it is recognised under the Family Law Act and may be taken into account by a court if future parenting issues arise

If required, I will issue a Section 60I certificate that honestly reflects what occurred. Depending on the certificate type, the next step may be further negotiation, returning to mediation at a later point, or proceeding to make a court application.

What mediation is not

Mediation is not a court process. I do not make decisions, impose outcomes, or tell either party what they must do. My role is to facilitate a conversation that gives both parties the best possible chance of reaching their own agreement, one that reflects what works for their actual family rather than what a judge might order for an average case.

It is also not a substitute for legal advice. I strongly recommend that both parties obtain independent legal advice before attending a joint session. Knowing your legal position before you negotiate gives you a grounded starting point. It means you can evaluate what is on the table rather than agreeing to something you later regret.

A note on my background

As both an accredited Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner and an admitted solicitor, I understand the broader legal framework surrounding separation. My role during mediation, however, is to facilitate discussions and provide information about the process rather than legal advice to either party.

You do not need to know exactly what the outcome should be before contacting Resolve Well. The first step is simply a conversation about your circumstances and whether family dispute resolution is the right pathway for you.